SEPTEMBER
2000

Issue 3
Volume 1

Title:       "A True Proverbs 31 Woman is a Submissive Woman"
Author:   JoyPals, Editor&Publisher: "Heavenly Notes" 
Source:   Heavenly Notes 2000, c.1984-2000 

"Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and He is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything."
 Ephesians 5:22-24

In the Christian community, one of the most often-asked questions by Christian women is:  "How do I become a Proverbs 31 Woman?" or to say it another way, "What is a Proverbs 31 Woman or "Virtuous Woman?"[1] There have been many books and publications written addressing this issue, both good and bad, and covering every aspect of this sought-after title, but for the sake of keeping these articles short and concise, I will touch on the most important one -- submission.  A "true" Proverbs 31 woman is a woman who is in submission to her Lord, the Word of God, and her husband.  She is a woman of faith, a woman of submission, a woman of boldness and a woman of strength.  

Ephesians 5:22-33:

Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and He is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave Himself for it; That He might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, That He might present it to Himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church: For we are members of His body, of His flesh, and of His bones. For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh. This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church. Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband."

"Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord." Colossians 3:18

"Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives."  I Peter 3:1   

On Submission

An important aspect of understanding God's role for women and in particular, wives, is first to understand the basic doctrines of Scripture concerning God's plan for His church and His authority structure.[2]

• God set up an authority structure for the family and the church. 
• God made man to rule. 
• Man is the "head" and "leader" of his wife and family.
• Man is the leader in church. 
• Women are to be submissive in the home and in the church. 
• They are the "weaker vessel"[3] and this is God's ordained role for them. 

The authority structure is God's structure and it is not to be changed by man's whim or the dictates of the world. When we submit to the Scriptures regarding the role He has ordained for us, we are submitting to Him. If we rebel against the role He has for us, we rebel against Him. Within the role God has ordained for us as women, He has provided all of the gifts, abilities, knowledge and everything we need for "life and godliness." 

He has given us tasks to fulfill as women:  

• Wives -- loving, submitting, supporting and "reverencing" our husbands;  
• Mothers: bearing children, teaching children; 
• Teaching the younger women; 
• Keeping the home; 
• Praying; 
• Students of the Word of God: studying to show ourselves approved unto God; 
• Ministries: ministries of mercy, children's ministries;  women's ministries;
• Being Titus 2 and Proverbs 31 women: women of faith, women of submission, women of boldness and women of strength. 

Just as the man is subject to Christ, so "women must be the their husbands in everything."  A "true" Proverbs 31 woman submits to her husband in everything.  She is under His authority and submits in loving obedience to her Lord and her husband.  I like this statement: “A Christian wife is called to grateful acceptance of her husband’s care and leadership.”[4]  A submissive woman is thankful for the role the Lord has given her.  She is "happy" in this role.  She is a woman who is Christ-centered, virtuous and blessed.

Submission in the Church and Home:

Just as the Lord has set up an authority structure for the family, He has set up an authority structure for the church (Pastor, Elders, Deacons [they are to be men and men only]).  They are to rule the church and to keep her doctrine pure.  Women are to be "silent"[5] in the church, i.e., not serving in a ruling office, i.e., pastor, elder, deacon, or have any authority over man, nor teach man, but to be in submission. [6] Does that mean women cannot speak in the church? No, it means she cannot "teach" or lead in any ruling capacity or act as ruler over men. She make "speak" in the sense of talking, fellowshipping, greeting, singing, nursery, women's ministry, children's ministry, etc. but not in a "authoritative" role over men. She is to be under submission, both to her husband and the church. She is to learn in "silence" -- not teaching men but learning and then asking questions of her husband at home. If she does not have a husband, she is to ask her pastor and elders; if she is still young at home, she is to ask her father. She may additionally learn from Women's Bible Studies, Women's Retreats, Women's Ministries, but her husband must always approve of the studies and lessons and correct any doctrinal error.  He is the overseer the Lord has placed over her to "watch" for her soul and thus she submits to him as an obedient wife and in submission to the Lord. This is the biblically ordained role for women.

A "true" Proverbs 31 woman is a submissive woman. She brings honor to the Lord and her husband.  She is a woman whose “own works will praise her in the gates.”[7]  

O LORD, Giver of all gifts and blessings, grant that we might be obedient children serving you from a grateful and loving heart and that You alone may be praised and magnified.  In Jesus Name, Amen.

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[1]  "Who can find a virtuous wife? For her worth is far above rubies.  The heart of her husband safety trusts in her; so he will have no lack of gain.  She does him good and not evil all the days of her life.”  Proverbs 31:10-12

[2] “But I want you to know that the head of every man is Christ, the head of woman is man, and the head of Christ is God.”  I Corinthians 11:3

[3] I Peter 3:7

[4] Geneva Study Bible, note: 5:22, p. 1869

[5] “And I do not permit a woman to teach or to have authority over a man, but to be in silence.” 
I Timothy 2:11

[6]  “Let your women keep silent in the churches, for they are not permitted to speak; but they are to be submissive, as the law also says.  And if they want to learn something, let them ask their own husbands at home; for it is shameful for women to speak in the church.”  I Corinthians 14:34-35

[7]. Proverbs 31:31b

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